रेड तुएस्दय -Red Confessions

This sari belonged to my younger

sister Namrita, she gave it to me.

Its hand-woven cotton.

We call it hand loom textile.

Its about 25 years old.

Namrita called this morning and talked with mama and me for a long time. She has an Internet connection on her Nokia, but is trying to

get her PC hooked up.

I bought this water melon from the

market today.

My adopted sis, Sonia advised me to always

ask the fruit wala to cut open the melon

and show the inside flesh to make sure its red and juicy.

Otherwise you are left with an unripe, useless one.

I like watermelon with a little salt and pepper sprinkled on it.

Black salt is even better.

Made a bottle of ketchup.

_________

Thank you praying for us friends.

My mother is some better, but has lost her

appetite and this is where the confession part

of this post comes in.

I don 't know about other caregivers

but when my care-givees (charges)

don 't eat properly I get the

caregiver 's frustration virus.

I see my mother so weak and pathetic, when she refuses nutrition I

become

frustrated, impatient and angry too.

I feel like a rusted thorn bush.

A kicked and bruised tin can lying in

a mud puddle.

Can anybody relate to this?

I need help with my

caregiver 's guilt.

I feel like I have screwed up everything.
I feel distressed and dismayed.