This morning Pastor and his wife took Mom and me to the hospital for tests. Everything went well.
When the doctors started the ultra sound , one of them asked me if I had a previous report. I told him I had it and had shown it to the chief surgeon.
Now that must have been a routine question but it started a conveyor belt of fearful thoughts in my mind. I presumed that he asked me that because he had seen something terrible inside Mom...some horrible malignant growth or tumor. And I was too afraid to ask him about it.
I tried to appear normal to everyone but my mind was sweating terror droplets of fear. Pastor offered to pick up the reports in the evening but I politely declined his kind offer saying I could do it.
Reasoning in my mind that if the report was alarming then I should see it alone and discuss it with the doctor all by myself.
I am sharing this with you because I want to tell you friends that I forgot the promise God gave us yesterday in our devotions -
"But they did not understand what He was saying to them,-This sickness will not end unto death.No, it is for God 's glory so that God 's Son may be glorified through it." (Gospel of John)
The devil erased its memory from my mind and injected me with thoughts of fear and dread. I had a terrible day with this internal "operation desert storm" against my soul.
I reached the hospital much ahead of the report dispensing time. I was literally shaking when the hospital staff handed the report to me.
I nearly tore open the envelope to read it collapsing on a chair. There was nothing unusual in it. Gradually relief fluttered down on me like icy cold snowflakes.
I met the surgeon later on and he gave me the nod to admit mother. We will do that on May 14th, God willing.
I nearly lost to Goliath today because I forgot God 's promise .
We are on the winning team.
Please continue to pray for us.
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